Today, it must be said, was not one of the best days.

The stock market had the worst day it’s had since 2001.

There was a gratuitous snake in the driveway this morning when I went to take the garbage out.

My computer is broken, and I have to figure out how to write blog posts on this other computer which does not know all my little shortcuts, passwords or software thingies. And if it doesn’t know them, how am I supposed to know them?

My tooth just maybe MIGHT perhaps have the beginnings of an expensive toothache.

But, as so often happens on apocalyptic days when snakes and teeth and stocks metaphorically combine, there are some redeemingly good things happening too. And one of the best things today was that I got directed to a blog that tells you what your name would be if you had had the misfortune to be named by Sarah Palin.

As everybody knows, she has given her five children names that nobody else would ever have thought of in a million years: Track, Trig, Bristol, Willow and Piper. So what would she have named YOU?

I would be named Fowl Overtime Palin. (I wish to be known as Overtime, I think, because Fowl could be so misunderstood. I’d have to be forever spelling it for people and saying, “No, NO! NOT with a ‘U.’ FOWL, like the birds.”) And my husband Jim would be Buster Taint Palin, which is just so delicious that I may have to start calling him that. Of our three kids, Ben would be Drown Wing; Allie would be Grill Igloo, and Steph would be Stepper Choke. I can’t imagine why I didn’t think of Stepper Choke instead of Stephanie Jane. Failure of imagination, maybe.

So go there now and find out your Palin name. And then…for heaven’s sake…go register some would-be Democrats to vote! (But first, please tell me your name!)